Ali vs Frazier. Alvarez vs McGregor. Keith Richards vs human mortality. And now, San Marino vs Thomas Müller.
Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve reached peak beef.
After world champions Germany demolished San Marino 8-0, Thomas Müller decided to really stick it in to the European minnows. As if the eight goals weren’t enough.
“Matches like the one against San Marino have nothing to do with professional football,” said Müller.
“I do not understand the meaning of games such as these, more so with such a busy schedule.
“I understand it for them, especially playing against the world champions, I also understand that we can only defend with hard work.
“Precisely for this reason, however, I wonder if these are not games that lead to unnecessary risks.”
Has he got a point? Probably. Were his comments uncalled for? Again, probably. San Marino are just playing the game they love, Thomas. San Marino aren’t hurting anyone, Thomas. That is until their press officer decided to go in pretty damn hard on the Bayern Munich forward.
In a Facebook status, Alan Gasperoni posted the following:
“Dear Thomas Müller,
You are right. Football games like the Friday night one are meaningless. To you. Again, dear Thomas, you don’t need to come to San Marino almost for free in a weekend in which, without the Bundesliga, you could have sat with your wife on the couch of your luxury house, or maybe you could have gone to an event set up by the sponsors earning several thousands of euros. I trust you but I allow myself to give you 10 good reasons for which I think that the game, San Marino vs Germany, was very helpful, and you can think about that and give me your opinion…
1) It was helpful to show to you that even against weak teams like ours you can’t score, and don’t say you weren’t pissed off when Simoncini didn’t let you be among the scorers…
2) It was helpful to your directors (let Rummenigge and Beckenbauer know too) that football is not your property, but it’s of those who love it among which, like it or not, we are too.
3) It was helpful to show to hundreds of European journalists that there still are young people following their dreams and not your checks.
4) It was helpful to prove that you Germans will never change and that history did not teach you that presumption doesn’t always mean “victory”.
5) It was helpful to let 200 San Marino kids that followed the game for what reason their coaches ask them to work hard and at their best. Maybe one day all of their sacrifices will be rewarded with another match against the World Champion.
6) It was helpful to your Federation (and to ours too) to earn image rights money with which they, in addition to paying you for the trouble, can build structure for the kids in your country, football academies, safer stadiums…Our Federation – I tell you a secret – will build a new field in an isolated little town called Acquaviva. You could have built it with six months of your salary, we will with the money from a 90 minutes match. Not bad, is it?
7) It was helpful to a country as big as a sector of your Allianz Arena to appear on newspaper for a good reason, because a football game is always a good reason.
8) It was helpful to your friend Gnabry to have a debut and score a hat-trick. Now he can ask Werder for a new contract and double salary.
9) It was helpful to those San Marino people a bit sad for reminding them that we have an actual national team. It can happen to you -that are almost perfect- that when you lose someone will wake up and start bothering you, right?
10) It was helpful to me to let me understand that even if you have the best Adidas kit deep down you still are those who wear white socks and sandals. With love, Alan.”
Ouch. Your move, Müller.
MORE MULLER
Thomas Müller, the very definition of banter. Or ‘geplankel‘, as Google Translate tells me the Germans call it:
